You Drive Me Craze, What a Pistol, and Lady Date Penelope.
1. Remember how I got my parents new phones and an unlimited text plan? My father has been trying to teach my mother how to send text messages. By “trying to teach”, I mean “forcing her to learn”.
Today, he forwarded a message to me and said, “This is mom’s first text message to me.”
It said: “You drive me craze.”
English is her second language. I sort of think it’s the best text message ever.
2. A friend of mine recently lost her father. This is the same close friend whose cousins drove their father’s ashes around in a Nieman-Marcus bag in the trunk of their car. Needless to say, the family has a wild side and a very good sense of humor. Her father was also quite the character.
I had flowers sent for his service and was understandably upset when a friend told me that they had not arrived. I called the florist, left a message and a half hour later, got a call back. The flowers had been delivered to the wrong funeral.
See, the thing is - I had them write a message on the card. And this means… that someone else’s funeral had flowers at them with a card that said:
“WHAT A PISTOL.”
All I could think was that I hope it wasn’t a gunshot victim.
3. My dinner last night – fondly nicknamed my Lady Date by Dysfunction Junction – was awesome. The restaurant is always so gracious and awesome. Kitchen / Back of House tour ended the evening. Evening started, however, with a gift which shall heretofore be known as LADY DATE PENELOPE.

It’s a heart picture frame in which they’d placed a picture of Penelope Cruz. I shall be taking her to different locations and taking picture of her like she’s the Travelocity Garden Gnome.
















Then off to the Green City Market for fresh vegetables. And fresh, hot apple cider donuts, eaten as we wandered. Then back to the loft where we made quick salads, boiled some fresh fingerling potatoes, steamed green beans and pan fried the red snapper. While all that was being prepared and cooking, I shucked oysters for the first time in my life. Quite a meal.



1. It’s been a nice weekend. Besos and I had a very nice dinner of French food with another couple on Saturday night. And we woke up this morning to a beautiful day in Chicago. Within moments of waking, we decided to walk to a nearby breakfast restaurant and eat outside. Here’s Little Filthy under the table hoping his sad faces will convince another diner to give him something to eat.
Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.