Random Esquire

My family loves the ocean. So Turks and Caicos was the January get-away this year.

My sister and I are only 13 months apart and have grown closer as the years have gone by. We were sitting on the beach, in about a foot of water, looking out over the turquoise ocean and blue sky. Puffy white clouds were drifting lazily through the sky. I thought, “This is some serious family bonding right here.”

My sister took in a deep breath of air and turned to me.

“I heard that when you get older, your pubic hair turns gray.”

*blink*

I said, “What?”

She said, “When you get older. Your pubic hair turns gray. But that’s not going to happen to me.”

I burst out laughing.

She said, “I’m not kidding! I don’t care how old I am. I’m going to be dragging my oxygen tank into the European Hair Salon and getting that taken care of.”

I got up and brushed the sand from myself.

I said, “Family bonding time is over.”

Welcome to the family.