Little Filthy Is Not Pleased With Me.
On Monday night, I went out to eat. I returned home and promptly snapped my key off in the lock to my front door. I proceeded to try to tug out the snub of key, thereby rattling the doorknob around. This, of course, informed Little Filthy that I was home. However, it also appeared to inform him that while I was home, I was completely uninterested in seeing him or seeing to the needs of his bowels. As I wiggled the key, I heard long, wretched cries from the other side of the door. Actually, as I write this, it threatens to be unbelievably long. Let me just summarize:
Locksmith comes. Proceeds to stick it to me. Drills out the lock. Wants to install another lock. I decline his offer to install a $20 lock for $120. Fuck that. I’ll just kill anyone who walks through the bloody door.
Next day, I wake up to find cherry stems spread around living room. Stupidly, I left cherry pits on the coffee table. Little Filthy attempts to look innocent while I have a Come-To-Jesus-Moment.
Cherry pits = Toxic.
Cherry pits = cyanide.
Website searching, friend asking, dog eyeballing.
Emergency Vet call.
Hydrogen peroxide goes down Little Filthy’s throat, to his complete surprise, disgust, and amazement.
Little Filthy stares. I reach under him and wiggle his belly.
Vomit.
Cherry pits.
Little Filthy STARE.
Sorry, Little Filthy.
Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
August 4th, 2010 at 4:27 pm
has he pooped on your pillow yet?
August 4th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
That, my friend, is “the stink eye” if I ever saw it.
You in trouble now.
August 4th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
Oh no! So glad he’s OK – funny little bugger.
August 4th, 2010 at 4:56 pm
Good lord…that’s an absolutely disgusting story.
Well done!
August 4th, 2010 at 5:40 pm
he is seriously so damn cute!
August 4th, 2010 at 8:33 pm
Momma said it. Stink. Eye. WOW is he pissed.
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
Cannot. Stop. Laughing at you.
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
No that explains the stink eye he has been giving you.
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
Definitely the pooch eye. It has “BEWARE” written all over it.
No telling what he has planned for your floors,shoes or sheets. Just to play it safe you’d best cook him up some bacon.
( Sorry the two of you had such a stressful night)
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
Aww, he looks adorably sad in this photo. He also kind of looks like someone socked him in his right eye and he’s trying to get a good look at him or her.
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
Stink eye. For sure. Or sometimes I use the phrase ‘hairy eyeball’.
You left out the part about the food…what did you have for dinner? Was it delicious?
August 5th, 2010 at 4:06 am
If you forced hydrogen peroxide down my throat, I’d be a little pissed too – is that really what the vet recommended?
August 5th, 2010 at 4:07 am
Poor LF. I hope he’s feeling better now. And ICK.
August 5th, 2010 at 7:18 am
Poor baby. I hope he is better now, and no longer giving you “stink-eye!”
August 5th, 2010 at 7:18 am
I think Little Filthy needs this to cheer him up: http://www.etsy.com/listing/51783209/doggie-boob-scarf-vanilla-pug?ref=v1_other_1
August 7th, 2010 at 8:16 pm
Oh yeah, I think you should look into getting LF a standing RX for injectable B12, and keep some on hand. It’ll stop cyanide poisoning in it’s tracks. Or, you know, you could keep the cherries out of doggie reach.
August 8th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
Oh god that’s gross, poor Lf, poor you…
I did laugh HARD at that boobie scarf for the pug. That pug looks just like my Izzy with the whole tongue thing. I agree, LF needs a snack tray scarf for those cold morning walks!
March 23rd, 2011 at 9:52 pm
Cutest mean face ever. And so glad he’s okay. And I sure have learned a lot about what fruits not to feed dogs from you tonight.