I Have a Prostitute. She’s an Old Lady. Did You Know?
I am already the problem student in Spanish class.
But it isn’t really my fault. See, we were going over nouns and what is masculine and feminine and I noticed that you say ‘el gato‘ for male cat and ‘la gata‘ for female cat. So I applied my awesome logic to this and here is how it went:
Random: “Ohhh, so if I have a female dog, I’d say ‘yo tengo una perra‘.”
Teacher: *GRIN*
Random: *Blink*
Teacher: “‘La perra‘ means ‘bitch’ and in parts of the world, ‘la perra‘ is slang for prostitute. You said that you have a prostitute.”
Random: *Blink*
*Sigh*
So class continues and we are practicing sentences aloud. I am supposed to say that I am on a trip.
Trip.
Which is, in Spanish, viaje.
“en un viaje” = “on a trip.”
Except, if you can’t remember the correct word for trip and you can’t remember if it is masculine or feminine, one might say in class:
“… en una vieja.”
Which basically means “on an old lady.”
That’s right. I said that I was on an old lady.
So, just to recap so we’re all together:
Class #1: I informed the class that I have a prostitute and that I am on an old lady.
I am already the problem student in Spanish class.
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Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
July 22nd, 2010 at 9:19 pm
Well the prostitute thing could have happened to -anyone- (although, for some reason, it seems much more likely to happen to you), and technically, you were correct…a female dog -is- a bitch. They shouldn’t expect you to keep up with the slang too! I don’t even speak English slang!
Don’t feel too bad. I told a patient last week “orinar en una bata” instead of “orinar en una taza.” I couldn’t figure out why she looked so confused, and then I realized that I told her to pee in her gown instead of put on her gown and pee in a cup. -sigh-
Damn Spanish.
July 22nd, 2010 at 9:28 pm
Cool, can’t wait until you tell her your special “vagina butter” Spanish phrase.
July 22nd, 2010 at 11:18 pm
LOL, I had a bad feeling about you in Spanish class.
I’m taking French and I bet you I’ll end up accidentally callling someone a whore.
July 22nd, 2010 at 11:22 pm
@Susan – Nice! Please pee on your gown and put on this cup.
@Avitania – *cough* I wonder who would have taught me such a disgusting phrase?
@Sandra – Did you really?? Don’t I seem like a model student?
How far along are you in French? I studied French for about 5-6 years but think the Spanish will serve me better now.
July 23rd, 2010 at 5:26 am
Oh, yes, this is going to be *so* much fun to watch. *snort*
(So how *does* one say “female dog” in Spanish if not the literal translation?)
July 23rd, 2010 at 7:19 am
@kissyface – ‘la perrita’.
July 23rd, 2010 at 7:29 am
So like, what you’re saying is, your type is a bitchy old lady?
July 23rd, 2010 at 8:56 am
Hi Random,
I’m at the end of my 6 week course in French I. Just the basics.
July 23rd, 2010 at 3:35 pm
You’re the problem child? SHOCKER!!
At least you’re trying.
July 24th, 2010 at 5:24 am
Be honest though RE…didn’t you already know, deep down, that you would be the problem child?
I mean, well, that’s what I expected already!
July 24th, 2010 at 11:47 am
No way. Problem student? Nah, You’re the highlight of the class!
July 25th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
that is AMAZING