Kissing Leads to Forking.
1. Listen up, ladies: Getting a French manicure won’t make you classy. You’re not fooling anyone.
2. I got a text message today that said “Kissing leads to forking.”
That’s right, people. If you aren’t careful, you’ll go from kissing to forking.
3. Did I mention that I bought new laptop because my old one was making a jacked up noise? The fan was making horrible noises. So I gave it to my parents to use/fix. And then I went out and spend $2200 on a new mac book pro. My father? He fixed the laptop.
By replacing a $22 fan.
D’oh!
Oh, did you hear what ruined the fan?
DOG HAIR.
4. Is it bad that when the people on Intervention readily agree to go to rehab, I doubt they ever had a real commitment to the addiction? I mean, come on. I’ve put up more of a fight over a piece of pie.
5. My left ass cheek is sore.
I can’t tell if this is because I am, in some way, favoring it.
Or if someone else is.
BWAH HA HA.
Okay, I’m dumb.
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Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
June 29th, 2010 at 5:42 pm
Hmmm…next time the BLT and I are in bed I’m going to lean over, run my tongue up the side of his neck and whisper in his ear…. “wanna fork me?” just to see what he says…
June 29th, 2010 at 9:16 pm
I’m a big fan of forking.
That is all.
June 29th, 2010 at 11:11 pm
Did your ass cheek get forked?
If it’s still sore in the morning maybe you could wad up some dog hair to cushion it.
June 29th, 2010 at 11:31 pm
You are so weird.
June 30th, 2010 at 1:27 am
I’ve always heard that as spooning leads to forking… just saying..
June 30th, 2010 at 4:33 am
A girl in high school use to fork my lawn. She’d buy thousands of plastic forks, come over and fork the hell out of my lawn.
I do realize, however, your “forking” is perhaps different than what I’m speaking of.
June 30th, 2010 at 4:33 am
And forking leads to porking……….
June 30th, 2010 at 10:04 am
Who sent you that text anyways?
French Manicures definitely ARE classy. Especially on toes, although I prefer color on my toes, because I don’t want anyone to mistake me as classy.
June 30th, 2010 at 10:04 am
Also, how addicted are people on Intervention that they will go to rehab? This means that they’re probably not THAT addicted, making the whole program kind of ironic.
June 30th, 2010 at 10:04 am
Please elaborate on #1! A few people have asked me why I don’t do my nails (I don’t like it!) and have suggested I get a French mani. I have done it in the past but I’m not a big fan -actually, I’m a big lazy.
@ QT: Did she ever explain why she did that?
June 30th, 2010 at 8:13 pm
QT, was she airating it for your parents?
What a weirdo thing to do!!
June 30th, 2010 at 8:31 pm
Letmegetthisstraight, a French manicure won’t MAKE you classy. Meaning you could be a total hog and still have a French. But you can be classy and have a French manicure. That’s what you mean, right? I’ve worn a French manicure for years. I’d like to think I’m classy! I love how clean and tidy my hands look. I feel professional. I can’t do a French to my toes though, I hit my feet too much and chip the polish. A chipped French definitely does not look classy.
I’ve been a part of in intervention before. My son, myself, his guidance counselor, and the school social worker were all closed up in a little office at school. We had a representative from the rehab place in the next room. When people intervene they know things are bad, but what they don’t know is that things are about 10X worse and only the addict knows that. When a lot of people more or less gang up on you I think it would be really hard to stand your ground for too long. Plus, on that show there is the added pressure of having a camera on you. Most addicts want to be free of their addiction and want the help. However, staying drug/alcohol free is another story.
June 30th, 2010 at 8:37 pm
@Debbie – Yeah, you got the French Manicure thing exactly right. It (alone) won’t make a woman classy but it is not *negative* classy.
Re: the Intervention/Addiction thing – I own that I’m talking out my ass there. Interesting insight.
July 1st, 2010 at 9:19 am
@Tiff and @Caper – I think, strictly cuz she thought it was hilarious. See, then she’d put Ben Gay on the fork handles, so when my dad sent me out there to pull up all the forks? Yup. Ben Gay Hands.
July 1st, 2010 at 12:46 pm
The things I learn when I pop in! The fork story is too funny. Now I’m actually thankful that when my house gets toilet-papered, that’s easier to clean up rather than all those ben-gay forks!