Mexicanicity, Mexitude, and other Incredibly Stupid Sh*t I say.
1. Besos is cooking dinner for me on Wednesday. She mentioned flan.
Flan from a box.
Flan mix.
Flan.
Which has, like, 4 ingredients.
I immediately questioned her Mexicanity. I mean, her Mexicanicity.
But I’ll still eat the flan.
And probably ask for seconds.
2. Along the lines of stupid shit I’ve said to Besos… let’s discuss her nose. I say it makes her look Spanish. Here’s a rough recap of our conversation:
RE: You look Spanish. I’m just going to say you’re Spanish.
Besos: What?!
RE: Spanish women are hot!
Besos: But I am Mexican! You only think I look Spanish because of that bump on my nose. Do you know how I got that bump?
RE: No. How?
Besos: When I was a child, some kid punched me in the nose!
*pause*
RE: I’m not gonna lie, … That kid did you a favor.
Besos: *Scream*
3. Speaking of Besos, her mother just came into town. I will most likely meet said mother. I will have to be on good behavior.
But seriously, people, have you met me? It’s almost impossible to get me on good behavior. The minute I’m supposed to behave, I just want to do all sorts of bad things. I don’t think I can help it. I mean, for about three weeks, whenever Besos called me, I answered the phone, “Housekeeping!”
Do you see? Do you see how perilous these next two weeks can be?!
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Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
May 24th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
“Housekeeping!”
LOL!
May 24th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
You are so much trouble. I have no idea why Besos puts up with you.
May 24th, 2010 at 9:42 pm
Besos should get some kind of award for her apparent saint-like patience with you
I think Besos’ nose is lovely (assuming the photo above is your beloved) and it is perfect, Spanish or not.
Oh and flan? Really? GAG, I’m sorry, I think flan looks like snot. I’m sure it’s tasty, but I have food consistancy issues. No way would I be putting that in my mouth!
May 24th, 2010 at 9:46 pm
@Beth – I fear you are encouraging me.
@Susan – I will be honest with you. Sometimes, in a moment of quiet reflection – I wonder the same thing.
May 24th, 2010 at 9:48 pm
@Tiffany – Yes, that is her. And yes, flan is sort of an odd consistency!
May 24th, 2010 at 11:16 pm
Besos is beautiful, and if she looks Spanish, it’s only because Spain colonized Mexico for over three centuries. Gotta rub off somehow.
May 25th, 2010 at 12:50 am
1. I’ve never had flan from a box. I didn’t even know there was such a thing. But I do know that yummy brownies can come in a box with only 3 ingredients! The best part is that you’re willing to try the flan-in-the-box and even have seconds. Must be love.
2. I bet at this very moment Penelope is looking at Besos’ picture and just wishing & praying that she could look Mexican.
3. You’re gonna be in soooooo much trouble. Seriously, you better have thirds of the flan.
May 25th, 2010 at 3:30 am
You’ll just have to do naughty things when only Besos is paying attention. Live life on the edge! It’ll drive Besos nuts and amuse you tremendously…
May 25th, 2010 at 3:45 am
That really is a fantastic picture of her, RE. You’re a very lucky person to be with her…so don’t blow it with the mom!!
May 25th, 2010 at 8:38 am
Good Luck, you will need it.
May 25th, 2010 at 10:18 am
“POOPIE PANTS”
’nuff said.
May 25th, 2010 at 1:44 pm
I love how whenever I talk about Besos, the general consensus is:
“She’s pretty. And patient. And AwEsOmE! DON’T SCREW IT UP, RANDOM.”
June 6th, 2010 at 9:08 pm
Flan is my favorite dessert in the world. Did you like it?
When my mom calls me I always say “Funeral Home, how can I help you?”