Work Wife vs. Work Girlfriend = Dead Random.
I worked last last night and my workload was lightened a fair bit by my most recent work wife. She’s a new work wife. I’m a polygamist in the office. Work wife and I have a work-deal to discuss so I sent her an e-mail asking if I could take her to lunch and we could sit down with the contract in question to discuss. She accepted. Simple, right?
Except, see, last week, I read my work girlfriend – Instigator – the riot act when I found out that she had brought her lunch to the office. Because, really, folks, what’s the point of a work girlfriend if you aren’t running off at lunch time?
There. Does that set the scene? Can you see how this is going to go?
I walked into Instigator’s office this morning and prompted peered at her eyeball and exclaimed, “You have green eyes! That will make a good picture!” She ignored me. Then she said, “Are we going to lunch today? I purposely did not bring something to eat!”
I opened my mouth and said, “Oooooooeeeeeeeewwwww…, about that….” and then Instigator’s brows furrowed and her lips curled and when I explained the situation, she said, “WHAT?!” I cringed. And then I told her who my new work wife is and that we had lunch plans. And then she picked up some paper from her desk, wadded it up and I instantly ducked down behind her desk to avoid the flying paper ball.
She said, “Look, first, I wasn’t invited to your Lady Date. Then, you didn’t take advantage of the fact that my husband was out of town last week. NOW we aren’t going to lunch?”
So I am eating two lunches today.
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Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
January 26th, 2010 at 12:58 pm
yep, and I bet she’s hopin’ you get indigestion too!
January 26th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
See? Having multiple wives turns out to be a little more work doesn’t it. ?
What is the fascination with men and polygamy? It’s always turns into a topic of discussion on my dates when they find out my religious background growing up, which I don’t even practice anymore.
It always seemed like it would be more work than fun to me. I have a cousin who was a polygamist for a while. Turned out he had a hard time finding a second wife, and gave polygamy up and went back to the mainstream. Frankly, I was surprised he found a first…
January 26th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
Surely you can learn how to juggle better than this. I’m disappointed.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:25 pm
@CBG – I find it best to look overwhelmed with two women. Then it isn’t obvious you have more.
January 26th, 2010 at 9:11 pm
LMAO at the last two comments!
Sucks to be popular, huh?
January 26th, 2010 at 9:35 pm
I always feel sorry for my boy M. who’s dealing with a wife (her) and a girlfriend (me). He always looks a bit baffled when we’re all three together. Luckily, I’m able to bond with her by making fun of him…Try that with your ladies.
And why didn’t you invite Instigator on your Lady Date, anyway?? I’m offended on her behalf.
January 27th, 2010 at 5:06 am
Oh, RE, I’m sure you’ve got women tucked around all over the place, absolutely DYING for a lunch or anything else out with you.
January 27th, 2010 at 9:42 pm
It seems you have it figured us women that it is best to always look overwhelmed then we won’t nag as much.