Random Esquire

1.  Some people are so grumpy when they wake up.

2.  Boss came to visit Little Filthy last week.  It occurs to me that there was no real discussion on who the monster would stay with when we split.  Nevertheless, I like to think he chose me in a courtroom setting by coming to me instead of Boss when we called to him.  But this is ridiculous because the dog doesn’t come to anyone when called unless your breath smells like peanut butter or dog treats.

3.  While at the dog park, I’ve taken to filling my pockets with miniature sized training treats.  Little Filthy knows I have them so if I call to him, he will generally at least pretend to obey by looking at me.  The unfortunate side effect of this habit is that I then have an eau de treat scent about me.  This means that I usually have no less than two other dogs following me around, trying to stick their nose in my crotch or pocket.

It’s a conversation starter, anyway.

4.  Have I ever mentioned that I tried to return Little Filthy the morning after we got him?  I woke early and was petting him when I saw a flea.  I’d never seen one before and, apparently, thought dogs only had fleas in theory.  I woke up Boss and, holding out the 2.5 lb monster in the palm of my hand (SEE RIGHT), announced that I was going to return him and demand my money back because he was defective.  I realize now that I was just hitting the responsibility panic button.  Dunno what I’d do if I had a kid.  Oh wait, yes, I do.  See, if you want to return a kid, the fire department is like that store that takes back everything without a receipt.  You just go leave it on the steps.  But if history is any indication, I’d keep the kid and spoil him rotten until he only answered if I waved a twenty dollar bill at him.

5.  My parents watched Little Filthy while I was out of town this weekend.  He loves to visit.   Afterward, however, my mother informed me that Little Filthy looked right at her, lifted his leg defiantly, and peed on her rug.  She was, however, laughing when she told me this.

It’s a love-hate relationship.  For both of them.