Kids: “What’s that hole?” and True Shame.
My niece (turned 3 in March) and my nephew (turned 1 in March) are in town, staying with my parents. I took two days off work to maximize my blog material with them. My niece does not disappoint.
1. We took Little Filthy for a walk. As we were walking along, my niece said, “What’s that hole?” I looked on the grassy ground surrounding us. No holes. I said, “What hole?” She pointed. “What’s that hole?”
She was pointing at Little Filthy’s backside. As you may know, Little Filthy is a pug mix and that means his tail curls up and sits on his back, leaving his exit door exposed. I said, “Oh…that’s…” and trying to be sensitive to what words to use, I used a word in another language with which she’s familiar. My niece said, “Ohhh…that’s his butt.”
2. My sister asked me if I could make a run to pick up some diapers for my nephew. I said of course. I was writing down what to get (because, did you know, diapers are numbered? Like pencil lead?): #4 diapers and baby lotion. I said, “Cool. Anything else?” My sister said, “God, I need a stiff drink. Or wine. Get a bottle of wine.” My sister and her husband are oenophiles.
There is a Wal-Mart just a half mile or so from my parents’ home so I decided to head there. Right to the back where I grabbed diapers and then over a few aisles where I found baby lotion. As I walked back toward the front, I saw an aisle with beer and wine. I decided to at least check out what they had. I found a Cab that looked decent and grabbed it.
Now, somewhere in the 10 or so yards I walked to the cashier, I realized that there I was…in Wal-Mart walking with diapers and baby lotion in one hand…and alcohol in the other. My own sense of propriety made me flinch a little but I tried not to give it another thought. That is, until the guy behind me in line said, “Diapers! And alcohol!” and the burst out laughing.
Annnnnd my shame is complete.
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Just a random attorney writing about daily life with Little Filthy, my rotten dog.
June 5th, 2009 at 10:07 am
I can’t stop laughing at the vision of you in Walmart with all of that in your hands. Oh man, that will make me smile for the rest of the weekend.
You’re the best, RE.
June 5th, 2009 at 10:13 am
@T, you just better quit being so cute. See, I’ve got a girlfriend and I don’t need a mystery crush on some woman on the innernuts.
June 5th, 2009 at 12:21 pm
*This* is GOLDEN.
I’m still laughing as well…
June 5th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
I hate to interrupt your love fest with T (read: QT = JEALOUS) but …
I’m more laughing the “What is THAT?” HAHAHA
June 5th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Heh, shame? That’s a typical night in Walmart for many folk I’m sure
Dude, srsly… we need to talk about your trip out here. Call me, yo! Lets get this thing planned!
June 5th, 2009 at 4:06 pm
I had a moment like that at Target once buying wine, doritos, and lube. The 17 year old that was ringing me up tried SO hard to keep from giggling, but it didn’t work.
June 5th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Haha. I don’t know if this is TMI but I used to laugh at women when I was working checkout and they would buy condoms or tampons and then have filler items to try to make it supposedly less embarrassing.
I caught myself at the supermarket all PMSd the other day doing exactly the same thing with my monthly supplies.
The cashier gave me a knowing look.
*sigh*
June 5th, 2009 at 10:28 pm
So what’s the big deal?
Seriously, you’re cracking me up, and the rest of the gang too… HILARIOUS!
June 7th, 2009 at 1:04 pm
From a single mom of two toddlers, that’s the only way to maintain some sanity. Bedtime = wine time!
June 7th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
Dude, kids say some wacky stuff.
@Carolina – I’m glad to hear someone say that! I suspect most parents looked at me knowingly.