Random Esquire

The Italian and I talked today and…naturally, the conversation turned to boobs. I declared that touching boobs outside a bra was the biggest sham going because bras do not tell the truth. It’s like judging a book by its cover.

He confessed that he has difficulty removing bras. I said, “I can unsnap a bra one handed in two seconds, man!” He said, “It’s those hooks in the middle…”

“You have to sort of pinch the sides of the clasp together and rub your fingers with a quick twist and it’s off.”

“I’m no good at it.”

I yelled, “What’s wrong with you, man?”

I told The Italian that people were finding my blog by looking up “Italian Sex.” He said, “I look up Latin Sex because I want to know where that’s happening.”

I said, “Latin sex happens in the butt.”

He said, “That’s Greek sex.”

Yes. We’re idiots.

There is something to be said for taking things on face value. My blog is this way. I like having readers and comments a lot. It’s satisfying. If I could, though, I ask that you just take my blog as it is, gaps and all, and not representative of anything other than what it is – one person’s random observations. It’s fair to say that I do not feel comfortable representing bachelors, single people, dating people, etc. Just me and my dog and my blog. Besides, I am sometimes horribly offensive and I wouldn’t want you to think that any one group could hope to muster up my all around offensiveness. So! For what that’s worth…

-Random Me.