Random Esquire

It was rainy and a little chilly today. The walk to work was dark and damp. I liked it. I left my office building and walked across the street to a little underground food mart where I picked up a block of feta cheese. Came home and put together a fresh salad and by the time Boss got home, matzo ball soup was finished. We ate big bowls of salad and soup and then Boss said, “That was great! I’m hungry.”

We have two routines in this house. One is for when I am the working stiff and Boss gets to sleep in. This is known as “summer”. Then there is the routine in which Boss also wakes for work. This is known as “war”. No, no, not really. There are plusses and minuses to each routine. I like the summer because the bathroom is never overly steamy and I like knowing that Boss can sleep in and relax. But I dislike navigating the bedroom in the dark and not turning on the news loud enough for me to hear in the shower. I like when Boss works because then I can turn on the bedroom light and the Today show. I shower with the shower curtain half open and peek at her while she puts on makeup. This means the bathroom door is open and that means Little Filthy is in the bathroom staring at me in the shower. He stares until I cup my hands to let them fill with water and then lean down so he can drink warm shower water. I don’t get it either. But he loves it. The bad thing about this routine is that Little Filthy misses her and I don’t come home to a hot meal, ready and waiting. OH HO HO. I just made myself laugh. Boss doesn’t cook. But I do like coming home to her.

I have my morning routine so perfected that upon waking, I don’t have to look at the clock until I leave for work. It’s beautiful.

Five things I love today (other than Boss and Little Filthy):

1. Square bagel bread.
2. My contract specialist who saves my hide on a daily basis
3. Moleskine notebooks
4. Finding new ways to pack lunch for Boss
5. Amazon.com.